CORONA, California – In a piece written for the Wall Street Journal, Steve Saleen went on record to voice his displeasure and shock to learn that entering a business deal with a major Chinese firm would come back to bite him in the ass. “It’s 100% wrong, they’re stealing my intellectual property!” said Saleen, “I’d expect this kind of treatment from Amazon, but not China. This is why I didn’t enter a deal with Bezos in the first place!”

“I believe I’m the first person to be screwed over by China, so I want to make sure nobody else runs into this kind of trouble! I did NOT see this coming. Nobody could have predicted this.”