SALISBURY, Connecticut- Triggered by Lime Rock Park’s Sam Posey Straight, self proclaimed social justice warrior Penelope Starfruit demanded an explanation from track officials as to why they insisted on pushing an agenda that promotes white male heterosexuality. “Every day we are reminded we live in a patriarchy, and this is no exception. Straight men rule our world whether it is Donald Trump or the guy who invented elbow macaroni, but I am here at an obscure race track in Connecticut to stop it,” said Starfruit, who was wearing a skirt adorned with dildos she had cut in half and hooked to the fabric as a statement of something. “We all know who Sam Posey is and what he means to racing and Lime Rock, but why do I have to endure being reminded that he wants to oppress those of us from the queer or curious about not being straight community? When does this oppression that I made up end?

Representatives from Lime Rock Park reassured Starfruit that straight was only in reference to a portion of the track and not Sam Posey personally telling people who to get down and dirty with.