INDIANAPOLIS, Indiana – To honor the now deceased Grumpy Cat, Indianapolis 500 officials announced the 103rd running of the Indy 500 will start by having the field of 33 run four “Silent Laps” to honor the cat Tartar Sauce, known to millions of fans as Grumpy Cat.  “Grumpy Cat was more than just a social media icon,” said Doug Boles, Indianapolis Motor Speedway President, “I tried countless times to have Grumpy Cat as the honorary starter, but the board would shoot it down and only try to get no-name losers like Matt Damon or Christian Bale to go up in the starter’s stand.”

It was also reporter that after Danica Patrick left the Indycar Series for NASCAR, Indycar officials tried to woo Grumpy Cat to be the new face of Indycar as all other drivers, still to this day, are drab and very boring mooks.