LEXINGTON, Ohio – Taking pride in not caring about things, like flooding or parking during this past weekend’s Acura Sports Car Challenge, Mid-Ohio management is already planning on finding new and creative ways to not give a shit next year. Heavy rains and below average temps would have led most tracks to have a contingency plan but not the stalwarts at Mid-Ohio. “It builds character in how we look at it,” said Victor Nest, who is supposed to be in charge of race weekend preparations but had to be woken up for a quote. “You think all the flooding and getting your car stuck in the mud was bad this year? Think again. Next year we are just going to replace the infield with quicksand and still make people park there. We are also developing new technology that will make it easier to have less concession stands and restrooms. Just you wait.”
In case people are skeptical of this bold plan Nest is confident the track can start charging $80 for towing out people stuck in the mud due to Mid-Ohio’s own negligence.