ST. PETERSBURG, Florida –  Just in time for the season opener that takes place around Albert Whitted Airport, IndyCar will begin selling a new line of officially branded apparel that will appeal to even the most casual fans as it comes with tenderloin grease stains already provided. “The tenderloin is known to IndyCar fans as a sure sign the month of May is just around the corner, but we wanted to let fans celebrate May year round, and that led us to this idea of just selling apparel with tenderloin drippings built in,” said IndyCar’s director of merchandising, who was wearing one of the shirts with an extremely accurate stain that looked like five fingers running across his chest. “If this venture is successful, we hope to expand to things like Snake Pit apparel with the smell of vomit, but that might be a little more difficult to replicate.”

IndyCar wants fans to know the stains are only a visual accent and should not be sucked on to extract any tenderloin flavor.