DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – After years of intensive research, meteorologist Ryan Pfister was able to conclude this weekend that Mother Nature (known as Subject MN) was in fact left at the alter in her early 20s, and as a result of that emotional trauma sends rain anytime someone appears to be having fun outside. “I’ve been studying Subject MN for the last 15 years. What I could gather from interviews with her friends and family and my extensive tracking and viewing, is that Subject MN has massive emotional issues stemming from the age of 21 and strikes out in anger anytime she feels someone is having fun outside”, Pfister continued, “It was confirmed on Sunday morning at the Daytona 24 Hours when I saw a young family of four laughing and snuggling up on the Daytona International Speedway infield Ferris Wheel when Subject MN struck down in a volley a rain drops, soaking the family and ruining a four year old’s PJ Mask stuffed doll.”
“While there’s still a lot to learn about Subject MN, we do know she’s a real bitch. Sunshine is just a ploy so you forget about what’s coming with hurricanes, tornados and floods”, ended Pfister.